Posted 25-10-2007
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YoY
by Luke Duffy

No money

Irreverent, sexist and definitely not politically correct

Seamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money.

Between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro. Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea." He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage. Seamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!" Murphy replied, "Don't worry, just follow me."

He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky.

Seamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? “We haven't got any money!” Murphy replied, with a smile. “Don't worry, I have a plan. Cheers!”

They downed their drinks. Murphy said, "Ok, I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth." The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.

They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free. At the tenth pub Seamus said "Murphy, I don't think I can do any more o' this. I'm drunk and me knees are killin me!"

Murphy said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub!"

It’s a fact!

A blue whale’s heart beats nine times per minute.

Pandas spend approximately 12 hours a day eating bamboo.

Flamingos live up to 80 years.

 

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